The Problem

 

I guess what I'm starting to realise is what happens when you start to question everything - societal structures; capitalism; citizenship - is that very little appears to lie outside of these constructs.

Maybe that's obvious to everyone but me; but here I am.

Some of these questions have been developing for quite some time now:

• I started questioning my existence as a citizen of the United Kingdom through the 2010 and 2015 general elections, and subsequent Brexit vote. All of which led - in part - to the formation of the Ministry of Ginger, which became a more solid concept in April 2019, and issued a Statement of Intent a few years ago, about dissociating from the UK in some ways

• A broader questioning of social structures has always been prevalent in my own personal development; I guess I might point to realising that I am ethically non-monogamous a decade or so ago, as one example - but others around class, religion, gender and others have for sure filtered through my mind on multiple occasions

• And finally - and most recently - I quit capitalism. Okay that isn't even entirely true - I am still beholden to a system of tendering money for goods and/or services - however I am no longer employed by an organisation that is ultimately in business for shareholders to profit

The latter causes me the most immediate challenges - whilst I am incredibly fortunate to be able to exist for some period of time without further financial income (and hopefully figure out a few of the above and associated dilemmas in that time!) - there do not seem to be hardly any alternatives to sourcing some sort of income.

Admittedly I am yet at the stage where I have given this extensive thought yet; but - by way of an example - if I believed in 'the State' and identified with all my heart as a citizen of the United Kingdom - I could, arguably, subsist on benefits from the state [I know anecdotally there are challenges and issues in this arena, and I shouldn't expect much or any help if I did!]; but that really is something I can't identify with. If I don't fundamentally accept the notion of citizenship, or at least the practical realities of a country and it's citizens.

A lot of charitable sector organisations also exist in this political space (perhaps inescapable I realise); so finding a worth cause (to me) that would also accommodate my personal alignments does sometimes feel nigh-on impossible. 

And already, I feel I've lost the vast majority of people reading this - I know I am incredibly privileged to be able to question just what is a country, and what it is to be a citizen of that country - even if you don't like much of what is going on in the UK right now, or has been for the past few decades - you still at some low-key level accept that you are a citizen of that organisation; and you would do well to not question that further - it really is a lot of hassle!

But when you are envisioning yourself as quite separate from all of that - even though your physical location remains in some location that is often globally recognised as a particular country - it becomes quite challenging to decontextualise yourself.

-

So what am I to do?

Well that is partly why I put this blog up today - to get at least some of these words out of my head, and down on an electronic page; to perhaps start to crystallise my approach to whatever-my-next-phase-of-life-should-involve.

Maybe I should establish the exact hardest of deadlines for existing without an income? Through a few things - like selling a chunk of my possessions - and other life-related incidents; I have managed to extend my sabbatical beyond the original '6 months and then start figuring out what to do'; but I do wonder if that extension is leading me to rest on my laurels, or not feel what should be a very real panic of not exactly knowing how to feed & shelter myself from a specific date onwards. 

All suggestions welcome...