Was It All A Dream?

A dream is a succession of images, idea, emotions and sensations that usually occur involuntary in the mind during certain stages of sleep.
At leas so begins the article on Wikipedia...

In which case, a few months ago I had a quite spectacular dream..

It started as I drifted to sleep with a partner in a bedroom in Oxfordshire...

We were both driven in a taxi, with a lizard for a driver, to a large building known as 'Heath's Row'; where we relaxed with free food and drinks for a few hours, before being taken by conveyor to a large rounded tube with fins, that flew across an entire ocean.

Once the ocean had been crossed, we were greeted by a fiery-eyed horse and dramatic lightning/lighting; and also by ever kind of cab driver - none of whom were originally from where we now were.

After taking spicy chicken treats from Wendy who's name was not Wendy, we then drifted to an apartment who's door did not work previously (yet still opened), and now opened and worked.
Here we slumbered.

By day, we found a diner that cooked eggs a million different ways, and stumbled upon a chariot of purest Orange, that burbled in a most pleasing manner.

In this contraption we arrived at the World's Largest Store, which carried an entire supermarket - and so much more.
Sandwiches of meat that had never seen an animal (but claimed to have) were eaten in front of a TV with an advert claiming their burgers were definitely not an animal.

By this point there is a dawning realisation that we are indeed in fact well-known strangers in a foreign land. And in fact we are here to attend a wedding of friends - which we now, in fact do:

Atop a very large hill (indeed it is known as a 'mountain'), outside underneath a white archway, a delightful celebrant tells of the journey these two friends have taken to arrive at this point in their journey. A lovely alternative to the often stale 'insert names here' approach that some wedding ceremony's can suffer from.

Afterwards, over canap├ęs the subject of bins and recycling in Armley are heavily discussed in detail with Paul's friend who used to live so close, but now in Chicago (via the far East).
Photographs capture our souls, but enough of them break free to engage in jovial discourse over dinner.
The juiciest (but not too bloody) steaks are served, following a American salad (with green bits and everything!), and proceeding delicious deserts, and speeches.

Wonderful sentiments are expressed; including our personal thanks to Uncle Jim for the loan of his cabin. A pythonesque silly walk stained glass is proffered in recompense, and gratefully received.

Afterwards, the Party Bus arrives to bus a party of people to their respective homes. Down hill and through dale, we traverse the streets of Denver - lost in the night - and then home.-

The following day, we drive high into the mountains (although it is important to confirm we did not drive high) and eventually our eyes rested, along with the rest of ourselves, in this delightful cabin in the woods:

After my partner in this enterprise discovered a stick that hissed, we had a wholesome evening meal, with a much appreciated interruption from the aforementioned and tale-full Uncle Jim.

The following day - I think it was a Saturday - we drove North once more, and did definitely not take the opportunity to rev the Mustang's engine in a tunnel in the mountains; no siree...

Upon our arrival in Silver Plume, a giant steam-powered beast took us down the Georgetown Loop, and back. All of our limbs were retained (at the requests of the guard), and hearing the whistle echo through the valley did make me grin like a child.

Afterwards, to Georgetown itself which was - in every sense of the words - a quaint old town.

Here I consumed the flesh of a buffalo, accompanied with peanut butter and strawberry jam, which was a most excellent of meals.

Afterwards, we ascended the mountain behind, following a brave group of skateboarders, who would descend under their own power at quite frightening speed; we expressed our admiration to them at the top, and continued over the top ourselves.

Ignoring the rain in our convertible, we chatted with some mountain goats before returning to cabin town, where we picked up supplies of margheritas and mint chocolate with a definite added ingredient.

Heeding the instructions given by the girl in the regulated store, we indulged that evening - but not before another walk in the cabin surrounds where we failed to see any significant wildlife - save for a few startled wild turkeys, which - honestly - I think I was more startled by...

Sunday took us out to the ball game.

Whilst allegedly being the worst teams in the division, the Colorado Rockies and Miami Marlins game came to a thrilling conclusion in the 9th, into a forced extra 10th - which, happily - our hosts for the day won.

Monday was largely a day of rest, so I thought, but an innocent little bicycle trip turned into a tiring adventure gradually up hill to the MASSIVE DAM near our condo; however the lovely infrastructure that supported the cycle path and impromptu 7eleven lunch (including a lime sprite and nutella M&Ms), combined with the return descent from the dam was a delight.

We did not witness any coyotes performing medical procedures in the area.


Tuesday held an early start to what is - quite literally - the largest wild animal sanctuary anywhere in the world.
That is, until they build an even bigger one in the south of the state.

We saw; lions, tigers, white tigers, black bears, brown bears, grizzly bears, arctic foxes, wolves, tortoises, all kinds of big cats - though I think our favourite was seeing the playful tigers actually running about after each other.

(Actual tiger pictured. Photograph courtesy of Mai-ana Hutchinson)


That evening we confused the locals by sitting outside in a rainstorm (although we did explain 'we are from England...'), eating most delicious pizzas and absorbing the atmosphere and each other.

Did I mention how pretty the car was?

For our final full day, wonderful co-incidence meant there was an Emily in the Denver area; and the three of us seized this opportunity to go 'river tubing'.
An ancient most sacred practice, whereupon you first close yourself in cat-covered shorts, apply excessive sun cream, and then select a rubberised ring from the nearby pop-up business; traverse alongside the river for approximately 20 minutes, and then gently slide back down the Clear Creek river, pausing only to get stuck in a counter-rapid, or if you have the misfortune to go 'in' (which I did - twice - but didn't panic as much as I thought I might!).

Sadly, technology does not provide images of my graceful drift down the river - so here is the steak I had for lunch instead:

And no, you're wrong. It tasted even better than it looked.

To conclude our day we headed to one of several malls that - on it's own - would dwarf Meadowhall; and yet this was one of SEVERAL in the Denver area. Size is quite definitely a thing in America.

Here, Emily recommended a local delicacy known as 'Cinnabon' which definitely replaced all of the sugar I had lost whilst paddling the Golden river. And some.

Sensing both the pathetic fallacy inherent in Emily's departure at this point, and also sensing my delight at being able to use pathetic fallacy in a sentence; the sky completely bucketed it down as we left the mall to return Emily to her lodgings; and indeed to begin our last tens of hours in Denver.
My god have I never seen so much rain and cars; and yet - thanks to the infrastructure already in place - the massive storm drains dealt with the water as efficiently as which it had arrived.


And so on the Thursday, we departed.

Bidding our car a fond farewell, we returned exactly to the 105th Meridian; spent some time in a bookstore (in which Mai-ana did not purchase any books - definitely not), and then caught our train past the fiery horse once more, and to that cylindrical tube that bore us home.


And this was the most powerful of dreams - one which came true. All of the above actually happened; and the overwhelming pleasure that it was to enjoy every part of it - without the distractions of everything 'at home' - which was probably the most dreamlike and fantastical part of it all.

Oh and we had a pool. Fuck! Forgot to mention that!

Picked up this sweet hat too:

Peace, y'all x


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