Objects in Time
If you asked me what I did last weekend, I would have to stop and look at my Google Calendar, and then go ‘oh yeah - that is what I did’, and memories would come back.
For more significant events, like weddings, I like to take tangible objects from those occasions, and keep a hold of them.
This year I have been to four weddings (fingers-crossed, no funerals), and pictured are four objects that I took away from those events.
Each anchor those events in my mind:
First there is the ‘diamond’ that my cousin’s daughter sold to me at my other cousin’s wedding; that links me to the family that were at the wedding - the images of the venue; my bedroom accessed by the bookshelf; the jam & honey I was gifted by the venue to give to my parents who couldn’t be there; the dancing; the plate of chips; and the friends of my cousin who had smuggled in bourbon biscuits.
Then came my school-friend Vicky’s wedding in the almost surreal setting of St. Paul’s cathedral. Here it was a wonderful privilege to be an usher and was asked to wear the highly appropriate musical buttonhole. Through this I’ll remember the sound of Final Fantasy on a St Paul’s organ; casually strolling past Wellington and Nelson’s tombs; my friend Alf and her tiny sauce jug; the excellent table themes; the photobooth pic with Vic; catching up with an old school friend; and Mariokart at the reception.
The jar was part of the decoration at my friend Shell and Matt’s wedding (there were sweets inside, but they got eaten ^_^ ), and immediately I can feel the sun on me (boy it was hot!); the sound of my recorded piano music wavering in the heat; the genius decision to have afternoon tea rather than a hot meal; free ice cream!; the gathering the night before in the pub and the apartment; the post-wedding Costa and pub; the wedding playlist; oh and jumping through a rolling hula-hoop. Obviously.
Fourthly came the wedding in France of Laurent and Laurence - here are the two glowsticks that I was given as part of the dance group of friends that performed at their wedding.
The two French weddings I have been to have the format of various skits and sketches throughout the celebration - sometimes involving music; sometimes a slideshow of the bride & groom’s journey together - and what sticks out in my mind from this most recent of weddings was how included I felt in the whole celebration - despite my French language skills (or lack of!), I figured out a few dances with L&L’s friends; I got to practice at Laurence’s family home/farm the night before; I got used to greeting all of her friends and family with a French double-cheek-kiss; I remember the heat at the afternoon canapes (le Vin D'honneur); the McDonalds the day before on Bastille Day - with sugary indulgence; the hospitality of my cousin Aurelie’s family the night before; the kindness of L&L’s close friends who took me back to my hotel in the late early hours of the day after; and so much more.
All four of these objects fix my memories to a point in time, which helps me try and contextualise where the rest of my time goes. I also hope that when I look back at these objects and others (like the pebbles from the beach at my cousins Alex and Aurelie’s wedding), the memories continue to come back.
But I guess the message to take from these as well is to keep adding to those memories. Whilst a wedding is a fixed point in time, a marriage is a longer journey; and I always wish to remain some small part of that journey - and indeed I hope that I will see my friends often over the span of our lives.
For now, this post is about fixing these events into my long-term memories, and whilst the dates/timings of events that have happened in my past tend to merge together - and only my calendar can fix these to a point in space-time - these objects I can at least tangibly anchor these memories to, and hold onto them for many more years to come.
It has been a while since I had time to write something.
In fact it was only due to unexpected circumstances that I had a free weekend to gather my thoughts.
And by gather my thoughts, I mean ‘write my blog whilst half-watching Netflix’, because my mind isn’t necessarily all in one place right now.
Which is fine I guess, but it does mean there is more to think about, and - well - the bad news for you, dear reader; is that there might be more articles coming in the near future :P
I find when I have time to think, I do so. And who knows what future places or ideas my mind might take me to.
I am but a mere complex object, travelling forward in time…